A month ago my husband began experiencing a terrible illness. You can read about it on Gamma Susie's This n That blog. Just click on the link on this blog. Going through this with him has done several things for me.
1. It has shown me how to put into practice the kindness that I wrote about earlier in this blog. God was preparing me for this time when He knew I would need ultimate patience with my husband who was suffering so much and needed me to understand and be helpful. This wasn't easy as one day he was fine and the next day totally helpless and dependent on me. It wasn't easy for him either because he wants to be in control of his surroundings and now he had no control. Frustration set in. But God was also working on him and he realized that he also needed to trust God and not himself to get through this. He prayed for a change of heart and kindness also. Together we are able to get through it.
2. God opened my eyes to the suffering around me. A member in our church was having a mastectomy. She had been suffering from cancer for awhile now and I didn't realize the extend of her suffering until she asked about Don. After I told her I asked how she was doing and she told me. My heart ached for her and I began to really pray for her. I hadn't done that before.
When I drove Don to the hospital in Denver and got him situated I went out to the car which was parked by the ER entrance. Two women sat on the bench out front. One was on the phone and the other was panic stricken. She was sobbing and asked, "Does this mean he is going to die?" The other woman nodded. A shriek of despair accompanied with the words, "Oh God!" were uttered. My heart broke for her and I prayed for her as I walked to my car. I wouldn't have done that before either. I would have just kept walking worried about my own situation.
Up on the hospital wing where Don was I noticed in several rooms patients with no hair, some vomiting, others laying quietly hooked up to their IV poles which delivered the "treatment" for cancer. I realized there was so much suffering on this wing. This is where they put the patients that were "seriously" ill. Though Don was suffering they were suffering too and some much more. Their outcomes were not as good as Dons. I prayed for them.
God was opening my eyes and giving me the tender heart I asked for. He helped me realize that He is the Good Shepherd and I am His eyes. I need to open them for Him and pray and talk with Him about it. I heard that scientific studies have been done regarding the healing of those who are ill. Those who were prayed for whether they knew it or not healed faster then those who were not prayed for. Got reminded me of this study and gently nudged me to pray for these dear children of His.
The Apostle Paul prayed for others. His prayer in Ephesians 1:15-19 is a beautiful prayer and I encourage you to read it. But if you don't know what to pray for tell it to God. Romans 8:26 says, "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." So I don't have to worry. God knows my heart and gives me the will to at least pray for others. His Spirit will help me with the rest.
I pray for you as you read this that your heart will be touched to pray for me and for others. Pray that God opens your eyes and helps you look through them to see the suffering around you. Then ask for the desire and will to pray for those who are in need.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
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